Enticing.
I’m tired of everyone and am starting to feel like a narcissistic bitch again. You know when you look around at the people you’re constantly surrounded by and can’t help but to feel like you’re on a completely different level than them? Not even a higher or better one, but just one so different it distances you. It distances you from relating in the ways you wish you could with people you know you care about.
I need a job and I hate hearing and saying that. Sadly, I really just want to leave. Again. I’m not letting myself do that, though. Dumb idea.
I’ve been telling myself for a long time now I need to just pick SOMEHWERE and stay long enough to figure out how everyone else leads these lives they do, and convince others or maybe even prove to myself I can do it, too.
It sure seems as if no one will ever respect or care about me (not in a way I give a fuck about) … but… They won’t unless I succumb to their ideals.
Sad.
Pathetic. Gut - wrenching.
At least I haven’t purchased alcohol in 4 days. Right? Also, my eyes look almost honey coloured today. It’s pretty cool.
